If you give a mommy 20 minutes to exercise, the daughter with want to go with her.
When you tell her no she will beg and beg until the brother joins in.
The brother will not only beg & beg but he’ll cling to your right leg and encourage the sister to grab the left one. You’ve just lost 2 minutes.
When you finally acquiesce they will run to find their shoes. 3 minutes gone while they search.
The daughter will not be able to find hers and start to panic and cry. Instead of looking she will constantly peek around the corners through tears checking to see if you and brother have left her. minus 3 minutes
When they both have their shoes on and the three of you walk out of the backyard and head down the street, the 10yr brother will stop his solo soccer game and call after you to ask, “Where are you going?!”
You will yell back, “Nowhere. Just walking!” but he won’t be able to hear you and you’ll have to stop and repeat yourself 6 times; rousing all of the neighborhood dogs and any Sunday afternoon nappers. minus 45 seconds
When you start off with a fast-paced walk the brother and sister will be so happy they’ll start running, leaving you behind.
They’ll run & run & squeal & scream with such vigor and speed you’ll worry about their safety.
When you start to run to catch up to them, they’ll slow down and say they are tired. They’ll beg you to slow down too even though you’re just getting started. 2 minute gone
The little girl will hold her little tummy and complain of a cramp.
The little boy will complain of his hurting foot and a rock in his shoe.
You’ll look down and notice his shoes strings are untied and then search for the rock before tying them. Minus 2minutes
Now that they’ve had a chance to catch their breath, they’ll squeal with delight and run off; leaving you behind wishing you had two leashes.
When you run and finally catch up with them they’ll be so tired they’ll practically collapse with delighted exhaustion. 1 minutes gone.
The little girl will ask for water. The little boy will want Gatorade.
When you give them both a swallow of your water they will feel so refreshed and energized they will jump up and run off leaving you behind. But you knew this was going to happen so you take off with them. 2 minutes down
They’ll love running with you so much they’ll want to hold your hand. The little boy will forget that your arm is attached to your shoulder and try to use it like a swing rope. The little girl will say that the water has quickly made it’s way to her bladder. 2 minutes gone
When you all turn around to run home the little girl will realize that running, “really makes it worse.” and she will start to walk…veeeery slowly!
The little boy will give her his best-est and loudest pseudo laugh just to tick her off. When he sees that she’s busy concentrating on holding her urine and is totally ignoring him he’ll top off his laughter with a pointer finger and say the sweetest words, “You’re a baby Tatianna!”
This will certainly get him the response that he was seeking and will cause such anger that she’ll almost pee on herself yelling, “NO I’M NOT!!”
He’ll start running and looking back at her laughing so loudly that it will ignite the chase in her.
With laughter tickling him and anger fueling her they will start to out run you causing you to fear for their safety.
When you run and finally catch up with them, they’ll both slow down from exhaustion and she will lash out and hit him. ‘”I AM NOOOOOT A BABY!!” 3 minute just went “poof!”
When you have the Don’t-Hit-Your-Brother conversation (again) she will start to cry from frustration and he will cry just to make her feel worse.
When the three of you walk back through the backyard the 10yr will stop playing soccer to gaze upon the two crying children (and a semi-crying mom).
When all are in the house it will occur to you that in the 20min available you’ve burn less than half a calorie and exercised a total of 190 seconds.
The little girl will forget that she had to use the bathroom.
The little boy won’t remember how thirsty he was. And they’ll both chatter on and on about how much fun it is “to be healthy with momma!” They they will beg you to take them again tomorrow!
Defeated (and yet amused) you will say yes and then eat their left-over grill cheese sandwiches.
I would love to hear how you get your exercise in your schedule when you have children. Leave a comment.